Two Atoms

Two atoms are sitting next to each other and one says, "I've lost an electron."

The other asks, "Are you sure?"

"Yeah," the first replies. "I'm positive."

Defying Physics

Professor Ben Stein was lecturing his physics class:  "If molecules can be split into atoms and the atoms split into electrons, can the electrons be broken down any further?"

A student replied:  "I'm not certain, but a sure way to find out would be to mail some of them in a Christmas package marked `fragile'."